Dating History as Told by Desserts

My first dessert was a Banana Cream Little Debbie,

sweet and blonde. We kissed under the dock during

a youth camping trip the summer before

I met Chocolate Fudge (no nuts)

who had a voice that was almost Allstate-deep.

That piece of fudge ended up preferring blondes

while the Key Lime Pie in starched khakis

wound up preferring boys not long after

he kissed me at the Bradley Central bus stop.

Turned out Graham Cracker was my fourth cousin,

which his grandma uncomfortably explained just before

we agreed to never mention it again. Oops.

I told Vanilla Custard I wasn’t ready to date

after his post-movie theater kisses

dripped with far too much saliva.

Praline Cookie, skin the color of a toasted almond,

made out with me in the mother-in-law suite;

He got engaged two months after.

I hope unsweetened, oatmeal raisin reads this one day

just to feel the weight of being an unsweetened,

beige, oatmeal raisin cookie.

Blackberry cobbler, slender and blue eyed,

lies asleep beneath crisp sheets.

Warm, he’s now wiggling awake.